23 weeks and growing.

After my appointment last week I have had time to sit down and really process what has happened between October 1 2010 and now. I went into this pregnancy full intending to fight tooth an nail if I had to for the VBAC natural birth I wanted for me and this baby. I knew I would get the natural part of it with going to the birthing center but the VBAC I was unsure of. Up until I talked to Nicole my midwife the first time I didnt know why officially I ended up with a c-section and she told me that I was a perfect candidate for a VBAC and Dr Roque approved it. I finally got to meet Dr. Roque at my last appointment and I wanted to ask her opinion of how successful she really thought I would be to prepare myself for the worst if she really didnt think I could do it. After talking to me for about 10 minutes I asked her How successful she really thought I would be and steeled myself for the worse. She then asked me more about my first labor and was completely floored with all the things that my old OB had done and told me that I should of sued him. She then reassured me with a gigantic smile on her face that I would get my natural VBAC birth and they wouldnt cut me open again unless they had first tried anything and everything else. I sat there when she said that and I felt about 50 different things all at once I was elated, sad, hurt, strengthened, wanted to cry, smile and hug her all at the same time. Its been sinking in more in the week since my appointment that I would get to labor and birth the way I wanted to and that I wouldnt have to fight for what I wanted. I had found a supportive and loving place that believed in me and my body and my ability to birth my baby. I have been building my wonderful support team starting first with my mom, husband, and close family then I added my wonderful Doula and friend Rae to the mix, and now I have added a loving and supportive birth center team and hospital staff that will make this all possible. I look forward to October with hope, joy, and a resolve that I will have the birth I always imagined because I educated myself and sought out people who would support what I wanted. 

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Feeling Elated

Had our 22 week check up today and I got to meet Dr. Roque for the first time shes the OBGYN that works with Nicole my midwife at the birth center. I knew that Nicole had told me that my VBAC was approved and I had a good chance at birthing the way I wanted but I wanted to ask the OB that made the call what the chances were for it to be successful. She came into our exam room and right away she made me feel comfortable and made me smile so I felt confident when I asked her how good my chances were. She wanted a few more details on my csection with Naomi and after I told her her response surprised me. She told me I should of sued my old OB and that 12 hrs for a first time labor was not even giving me a chance. My VBAC would happen and that I had a wonderful and great chance to bring Brenna into the world naturally and vaginally. I felt like I could touch the moon when she told me this. Sitting here now I feel like I want to cry I am so happy at the chance to bring my child into the world the way God intended for me to do so, in an environment that will be quite and centered around our family and her coming into the world, and that my wish for a natural drug free birth would be honored. Now more than ever I am looking forward to Brenna’s day of birth with hope, a renewed faith in myself and my body, and knowing that this will be a healing experience for our family!